Comments on a First Chapter

Jess Nevins has posted the first chapter of The Datong Incident, “an anti-imperialist steampunk-spy-romance novel”. Now, what’s not to love about that? My feedback on the chapter:

Excellent first sentence – establishes tone, recent history, level of tech. We’ve got world, inter-personal, and internal conflict all introduced in this first chapter, and we feel for Hall without knowing much about him yet. He’s in a position we can understand — duty to country vs. to home — and makes a decision which allows us to see a bit of who he is. Looking good!

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